On being a Ferrari

Padrone uses a wonderful analogy at times when He talks of owning me. He compares it to owning a Ferrari, and while of course the "property" analogy is quite obvious, He also uses that analogy to describe His own attitudes regarding owning me, His philosophies and sometimes even His motivations.

It's really cool, being compared with a Ferrari!

But what interests me most is His interpretation of owning me, aka FerrariGirl (sorry, couldn't help myself).

So often we, as slaves, are called property. Many people tend to assume that means we're reduced to mindless, emotionless, need-less *things*. Some would prefer that we not have an original thought in our mind, much less one that differed from their own thoughts. Some would prefer that we were like old-fashioned kids - seen and not heard. Some want robots. But most want it both ways...they want us to be this way when they want it, and at other times they want us to be the intelligent, wonderful women that we are.

It doesn't usually work that way - unless the different needs are well defined and clearly laid out that is. How can it be otherwise? We can't read a mind, even though with Padrone i almost can! But if i had no experience with clear-cut desires, clearly stated, then i would never be able to *almost* read his mind now of course.

What Padrone means when he calls me his property is that i am valued, not as a piece of furniture, but rather as a man values his Ferrari, the one who is lucky enough and rich enough to own one!

Padrone sees himself as lucky to own me, and rich (not in money of course, but in life itself) enough to do so. He has so much to give, so much to offer, and he does so freely....and the mutuality of our relationship means that he gets as much, or more, in return!

Kind of like owning a Ferrari, yanno? The Ferrari is a car meant to be driven...in an extreme way. It isn't a car designed to run errands in with the kids! It can be used for that, of course (well, maybe, but at least for more mundane uses) but it is really the kind of car a man looks at and drools over - imagining NOT the Wal Mart parking lot, but rather open road, fast speeds, power, and controlling the machine! But, as a car, it has the more mundane uses that it must be used for - like we live a "vanilla" life so often and the slavery is often beneath the surface of the relationship, so the Ferrari is most often used for "regular" things, and the extreme use is more rare.

A man learns to control the Ferrari, not with the intention of taking anything away from the Ferrari, but rather to FEEL that control of so much power, and also to enable him to "show her off" to more folks! It's one thing to have a Ferrari in the driveway, and a totally different one to drive it down the highway!

But a man takes the time to learn all the controls, all the ins and outs of the car... finding the soft spots that he must be careful of, finding the things he finds consistently reliable... all the eccentricities of his particular car... and that is half the fun of it! Learning by doing....driving, shifting, accelerating, braking, turning, reversing....using the car in every way imaginable, from slow to fast to a normal driving speed....until he knows it inside out and could drive it in his sleep....such a comfortable place, one that he can truly enjoy using it, owning it without working so hard to learn *how* to own it...and a place that others look to in envy at times.

Very similar to his ownership of me, actually.

It took a long, long time for me to think of myself as property. i thought it was demeaning to be dehumanized in that way. Padrone would mention "if i bought you at an auction" or something, and i would cringe inwardly at the thought. (told y'all i valued myself some, even when i would never have admitted it.) i hated being compared with a table, or even the vase on the table. i hated feeling that i had no purpose other than being useful, or decorative, or...anything strictly passive. i also knew that i had no future in that kind of mentality, long term, because of the personality that Padrone loves and doesn't want me to lose.

But a Ferrari....now *that's* a different story altogether! Why? Well, because that particular car is one that even *i* envy those who own one!

i mean, everyone knows a Ferrari is a valuable car. Everyone recognizes it by the very NAME - Ferrari. It is valuable because it excels in its performance, especially when used as it is supposed to be used. As a machine, it is subject to idiosyncricies as everything else mechanical is, things that make it unique and which its owner takes much time learning about, as i mentioned above. It isn't "just a car", it is a CAR, and only a few (in the realm of total car owners) are lucky enough to be rich enough and "man" enough to own one.

That is how it should be when one thinks of M/s. The slave should be valued simply by virtue that she IS a slave, but what happens nowadays most often is that the slave is relegated to being "just a slave".

Padrone has spent years learning to "drive" his Ferrari. He has learned me so well that owning me, controlling me, driving me is something He gets even more thrill from now than ever before. He loves to show off His Ferrari, His slave, His woman....and He knows that there are some who envy Him for who and what He owns. It isn't *me* that is envied, rather it is the knowledge that Padrone learned to drive His Ferrari so very well, and has taken such good care of her, that she simply shines with happiness and joy at being His.

And that is what being property means to me. i am not "just a slave", or "just property", although there are times when that perception is very much needed by us both - it is a false perception and that very knowledge is what allows us to go deeper and deeper into the realm of being demeaned with dehumanization. But i realize, now, that the demeaning mindset is simply the extreme "driving" of His Ferrari.

Padrone, thank You for patiently guiding me in the direction of understanding and accepting my place as Your property. Thank You for teaching me my value as such, BEFORE giving the perception of reducing me to "just" anything. Thank You for laying such a positive foundation upon which to build the humiliation that we both need at times.

And most especially, thank You for the care You take of Your Ferrari.