Taking Each Other for Granted

Padrone and I had a discussion the other day, albeit a short one, about taking each other for granted. It's always been very important to me to make sure that Padrone knows just how deeply I appreciate him - who he is, what he does for me, how he has changed my life, etc. And I think I do a fairly good job of that, overall.

But one time when I said something like "I hope you don't feel as if I take you for granted..." he replied with something that really kind of stopped me in my figurative tracks. He said something to the effect of...taking each other for granted can be good.

What?!

That made no sense to me, as it ran counter to everything I understood about relationships - or thought I understood anyway. But it makes so much sense now that he explained it a bit, and I am going to try to tell you why.

His thoughts were that as we grow in a relationship, that we *should* take certain things for granted. The example he gave is that he knows beyond doubt that I will do my best to please him and obey him...even if I fail, he knows that I did my best to succeed. In the beginning of our relationship he didn't know that, but now he takes that for granted - he doesn't even think about it anymore whereas early on he had to consider my successes and failures and explanations of failures and determine my honesty and sincerity - the actions he required were indeed tests of my submission and my integrity. And that's how it should be in the beginning of any relationship - indeed, that is how it *is*. And yes, I tested him to determine the qualities of his Dominance and how well they meshed with my own submissive needs, but it was also a test of his own personality traits as well.

But you know what? Now there *is* no doubt about who he is, or who I am in his mind. We *can* take certain aspects of our life together for granted, and not only is it not a bad thing, but it is very much a positive thing.

See, I know that my Padrone loves me, and I can take that for granted. It doesn't mean that I'm not amazed by how wonderful it is, or that I don't feel gratitude for his constancy. But I don't wonder anymore if what he feels is true, or how deep it may be, or if he will skedaddle at the first sign of real trouble. And I know what he expects of me, and how he will react or respond (for the most part - he can still surprise me at times: see posts about the wager!), but I know several things beyond any doubt whatsoever.

Padrone always has my best interests at heart, even if he requires or expects me to do things i don't really want to do, or don't see any value in doing. That was really hard for me to accept for some reason, maybe because his explanation early on of his generous, giving nature is that "a happy slave serves better"!

He loves for me to be happy. He loves making me happy and allowing me to do things that make me smile. He loves when things happen that are good for me, make my life easier or better in some way.

He enjoys my accomplishments, loves being proud of me. I used to try to shrug off his words when he would express his pride in me, although it made my heart glow to hear them. I would wonder ... not about his sincerity, but about whether he may have simply been trying to boost my confidence about things. But I gradually, finally, began to realize that he truly *is* proud of me, and now it is something I do take for granted. And you know what? Not only is that alright, it's a *good* thing!

Think about it for a minute. We've been together for 7 years. If I still had doubts about his having my best interests at heart, or loving for me to be happy, or being proud of me, or so many other things I could mention - after all this time - what kind of relationship would we really have? There comes a time for trust to reach the level that taking certain things about each other for granted is a positive rather than a negative, or else the relationship can never grow, and the participants can never be truly happy or fulfilled. Reaching that point can allow us to simply relax in our happiness and focus on being more and more fulfilled with each other in our lives.

The sole reason we are in relationships is to be happy and fulfilled, right?

So, while I appreciate all that Padrone is, and does...it really is alright for me to take certain things in our relationship for granted.

This was quite eye-opening for me, as I am sure you may imagine. Padrone, you are so wonderful to me, for me, and I never have the words to fully express my emotions where you are concerned. You always hear what I can never say, though, and I know that the depths of my adoration and devotion to my Padrone is something that you can, and do, take for granted. You make me more than I could ever be on my own. I feel powerful, beautiful, cherished, feminine, needed, and wanted. I feel invincible sometimes, Padrone, and so much of what I have been able to accomplish in my life is strictly due to your confidence, support, encouragement.

Padrone, being yours...not even D/s related, but simply being the one in your life who completes you, makes you happy, and fulfills you...is my greatest accomplishment. And knowing that you are as proud of me for reaching the point of being able to make you happy as you are of my other accomplishments, is yet another thing to make my heart swell and my smile glow. Grazie, il Padrone mio. Grazie.