Missing Padrone

Yes, we have seen each other a couple of times today. Yes, we have had some good communication. Yes, we do plan to see each other again tomorrow.

But i miss him anyway.

Today there was a small town festival in our little town, and it is the kind of thing that speaks of small town America at its core. Those of you from the US probably know exactly what i am talking about, or many of you will at least. The rest of you may have seen this kind of thing on movies set in the US, or have similar traditions in your areas.

Craft vendors, food of all sorts (yes, i DID resist the funnel cakes!), inflatable outdoor playground for kids, pony rides, even this year a miniature golf course!, lots of churches and civic organizations selling raffle tickets (that $500 sure would have been nice to have won!), local talent showcased on a portable stage, and thousands of people!

And i really, really wanted to have Padrone there with me, holding his hand as we wandered around and smiled and laughed. i'd love to share a funnel cake, to explain "chicken on a stick" (even if he didn't eat it because it's chicken), to watch him watching all the butts on display in the heat today (hehehe), to take his picture with the sheriff, and just to enjoy the day with him there with me.

i did feel incredibly close to him today, as i usually do the few times i am not with at least one of my kids or at work. i guess it is because i can focus on him more fully, let him take over my thoughts since i no longer have to split them between work, kids, and him. i took several pics and sent them to him, and have a few more to send as well, after checking my sent emails to see which ones i actually sent - lol.

But it is times like today that i really feel the geographical distance between us most keenly.

Padrone, i thoroughly enjoyed going to the festival today, and i am so glad you wanted me to go. Thank you, Padrone. i loved sharing my day with you the way i did, and am even more glad you enjoyed it as well. i am always half worried that you will feel left out of my life by me sending those pics, but i fully know that if you don't want to see them, you'll tell me.

i love You, Padrone, and i am so glad to have You in my life. i am grateful that you understand, as no one else can, the emotions of being yours but without being with you physically. i miss you, today, Padrone. And i know you miss me as well.