Much Ado About....Much

This week has been one of those "good news/bad news/good news" weeks. After the excitement of so many things falling into place last week, of course something traumatic had to happen!

Since i really don't remember what i typed here, i'll start with the good news of last week. i've learned that the program i have to enroll in, in order to get my one year certificate, is offered at the school where my son goes, and it is 3 classes in the summer, and an "internship" of 3 hours - nothing more than paid student teaching from what i understand. If there is more involved, i'll do it though. :) Anyway, 2 of the 3 classes are offered online, since i am doing the Special Education route, and that makes me VERY happy, believe me!

I'll get student loans to pay for it, since the school has gotten state department of education approval to provide this program in such a way that meets the Stafford Loan requirements. And when i was an undergraduate, i didn't have to take many student loans because of scholarships, so i never met the limit of maximum allowed and i could probably take loans out to finance a doctorate if i wanted to. *stress,stress, NOT*

Anyway, i'll be in school from June 1 - July 31, and only driving one day per week, which is really nice. i have a feeling i may have to go to campus to take exams with the other classes, but that's alright, i can handle that. i'm kind of excited, could you tell???

So i was flying HIGH, until earlier this week. i did something that got myself in trouble at work, and i accepted the responsibility for it, but the way i was treated afterwards really upset me and got my "back up". i honestly thought i was being terminated for something that i was told i was merely being "written up" for, and i got very, very upset. Poor, poor Padrone! i honestly don't see how he can put up with me sometimes, and the drama that i hate so much but which seems to be a constant part of my roller-coaster life.

That all worked itself out, though, thank God. Now i am again focusing on my application process and preparatory work for this program, and i am SO excited about it. i can't wait until i get the letter saying "you're in" and my schedule and my account and books and....i think i'm gonna LIKE being a student again, if i can get past the fear that i've forgotten everything i've learned. i know, i'm typical - lol.

AND, since the boss finally hired someone to replace the girl she fired a few weeks, ago, then i learned that it was physically possible for me to ask Padrone if i could take my daughter on a road trip. She has saved a ton of money, and is paying for the vast majority of it herself. i spent a LOT of time with my son while he was working on his Eagle Scout award, and planning his court of honor to celebrate, and so many other things as well, that she deserves this. i have been promising her for a long time, and this year is almost perfect timing. So i asked Padrone about it, and he gave his permission! We leave on Wednesday, will be coming home the following Monday. Man, am i excited!!!

It has been such an emotional week. i think i have been under so much stress that i am losing the ability to maintain control over my emotions as much as possible. i am so grateful...so GRATEFUL...to Padrone for the chance to simply go away for a while. We're not planning a hugely busy time, we both just want to hang out with each other and with some friends we're meeting. We have a couple of things planned, but for the most part it will be just relaxing and "chilling".

Oh man do i look forward to it!

And i know Padrone is ready for some ... well, i almost said boring times, but i know he is excited about the next few months for me, even though he knows it will be quite busy and of course stressful, from my current job, to school, to job hunting, to starting a new job knowing i am being supervised....but it will ALL be worth it in the long run, stress will be eased after a few months of different types of stress.

When my life is a bit easier financially and i have a job i love and have wanted for years and will enjoy, then i know some of the stress will leave. i'll be able to ... be a better slave to Padrone. He doesn't complain now, and that's something i am even more grateful for .

This i can say without any doubt. i would not be doing what i am doing, if Padrone weren't in my life. His encouragement and acceptance of my dreams have made ALL the difference in my life and in my future, and therefore in our future. i honestly didn't have the ability to do it on my own.

And it will take the rest of my life to show just how much he has changed it, and just how grateful, happy, joyful, peaceful, and simply content i am as his slave, but even more importantly, as his woman.

i love You, Padrone. Thank you.